If you're on social at all there are lots of people expertly giving out unsolicited advice on every topic imaginable. From how to clean you washer and to how to get bouncy hair all the way to how to make your ex jealous. It seems as if the world has suddenly become experts and they are all happy to share their "secret sauce" to everything.
For example, as we approach the new year, the ads you're most likely going to see will be about your health and weight. Naturally, the start of a new year feels like a good time to start a new program that will help shed the extra pounds you might have packeting on during this holiday season.
But what about the pounds that snuck up on you that had nothing to do with your weight? What about your mental health and spiritual weight? And before you see this post as another expert ready to share their "overnight" epiphany on how to "get happy" let me share my weight loss story.
By now, it's no secret that I had lived through and survived a very toxic relationship that lasted over 7 years. The metaphorical weight I gained during that time would prove to be the hardest to shed. I gained an acceptance of abuse, anxiety, stress, depression and self doubt that would weigh my soul down to my breaking point. Everyone always talks about wanting to look good in a bikini, but what about what you look like in your reflection? I learned quickly how to hide that weight with smiles and well groomed hair and perfectly placed makeup, but when I finally decided to shed those pounds that's when life was less about putting on a show and more about finding my happy.
If you find that you're in a place where the weight of the world, expectations of others, and a lack of support is too much, this is your sign to finally SHED THE POUNDS!
And I get it, knowing where or how to start always feels like the biggest step but this post aims to helping your get your sweat on and on the path to your happy place.
Based on REAL LIFE experience and me now being in a place to look back at my journey here is my road map, and I hope you find it helps.
Confide in someone you trust. It really only has to be one person that loves you unconditionally and will listen to what you're saying. You need to be completely honest and vulnerable with this person so they can fully understand your struggles.
Evaluate your environment. This includes work space, home life, friendships and entertainment. Your surroundings play a HUGE role in how you feel so CUT OUT the negativity where you can (even if that means certain friends). And please stop watching shows where everyone is sneaking and fighting and calling that "life".
Add positivity to your daily routine. There are so many physical things about yourself that social influencers are showing you how to change to be "better". "Do your makeup like this", "Do your hair like this", "Style your house like this", "Kiss your man like this". I would suggest injecting positivity into your life that's isn't based on a physical "what could be" and highlight a "what is". You could write yourself a kind post-it to place on your mirror, or call a friend to share 1 happy thing that you're grateful that happened that day. Forcing yourself to see the good in the ordinary will help push out the negativity.
Create a roadmap. Feeling lost is the reason why so many people fail to move forward or past a hard moment, there is no guidance to the next step. But sometimes it's easier to work backwards from a goal vs. laying out the steps on how to get there. Make yourself a 1 year plan, a 3 year plan, 5 year plan for where you hope to be. Without judgement or reservation, aim for your highest goal. Then work backwards on what it would take to get there. Create a roadmap that you can follow, so instead of thinking that there is an impossible goal you'll never reach, you'll have little bite sized tasks that will get you one step closer to your dream.
Forget that we are approaching a new year, forget that this "feels" like a good time to start something new, and realize that this is your sign to find your happy. It's easy to feel weighed down by so many things you never asked for, and instead of feeling like you have to carry that weight around and find it under your big oversized sweater, shed those pounds for good and take on this year (and the rest of your life) with self confidence and love. Because in the end, everything you could ever want to gain like trust, peace, positivity, and security will only lift you up and fill your heart.
And I can say from experience in my adult life, the lightest I had ever been on the scale is the same time I was weighed down the most. I worked hard to shed that weight and promised the rest of my life would be the best of my life, and you can do it too!